shitness.

I'm done with graduating. Want something more in life. I want to follow my dreams. Keep my head up high. Don't let anyone see my deeply hidden depression. I think i are fucked up. I'm a depressed happy kind of person. It sucks. Glad i'm not so deeply depressed tho. I need to get out of here. I want to go to career academy, get my degree, work for a while, hopefully will love my job, then go to college again to become a teacher. I think thinking i was going the wrong path was good for me. I hopefully will keep up my motivation, and do something with my life and not get stuck in this village. Please God. Make me a better person, too. Set me free. Sorry. Very sorry. I just don't want to fall so deep again. Hopefully i'm not jinxing myself. But hey. Whatever. Whatever happens, i'm in it till the end.

Relapse.

Jittery. Mind racing. Can't really think straight. I need a ciggggggg.